This 30-60seconds reel culture is taking too much from us. I find people losing interest halfway through conversations. Their minds wander if someone speaks for more than a few seconds.
Why are we rushing so much? And to reach where?
Why do people ask, "Can you quickly tell me in short what happened?" or "Is there any short lecture available on YouTube for this content?" How can something be told or taught in gist if it actually contains too much . But nobody has time for anything that is lengthy and deep . And in trying to consume everything quickly, we are slowly becoming shallow, constantly anxious to know what comes next instead of fully experiencing what is here.
Do you realise how much a person wants to say but doesn't? Not because they don't trust us, but because the time and space we offer are often too small for them to pour their heart into. This is the reason why so many people feel chronically lonely.The more time and space we give someone, the better listeners we become . When you listen carefully,slowly your mind & heart starts analysing the situation and that eventually will make you more empathetic,kind and compassionate.
I love taking pauses while talking, whether in person or over a phone call. Those little pauses allow me to absorb the other person's emotions and they also encourage people to express themselves and tell me what exactly they are going through.
Human beings exist in countless layers. To discover them, we must be fully present.Someone telling you that they are excited for their new beginning in career in one breath is insanely excited and someone telling the same sentence with a deep exhale and a pause can mean that they are scared as well and tired of what they went through in the entire journey to achieve it .
Someone telling you about an event may go further to add how badly they regret hurting their parents last Tuesday when you genuinely listen.
I love it when someone asks me, "How is life?" and actually waits for the complete answer without looking at their phone or mentally checking out before I finish even the shortest sentence.
I love listening when people describe the architectural beauty of a city they recently visited, the fascinating history narrated by local guides that enriched their knowledge, the delicious food they ate after descending from the mountains with mouths watering as they recall every bite, or how they bargained for a chikankari kurta and finally found the exact colour they had been searching for.
I listen as though I am living those moments with them.
How cute and charming one looks while presenting their excitement and happiness .It is so mesmerizing to see how beautifully little things affect humans, just like to a child in kindergarten.
It is not always about us where we can add beautiful tags to the pages of our lives ,sometimes it is about experiencing someone else's life so deeply through conversation that their memories quietly become a part of ours too.
I still remember a conversation from nine years ago. A friend told me about her uncle battling a deadly disease and eventually recovering. I still remember the exact number of therapy sessions he underwent because I was emotionally engrossed throughout that conversation.
We often see people hear someone sharing their pain only to respond with ,"You can't even imagine what I've been through."
First of all , congratulations to them for winning the award of suffering the most. But someone else's pain does not become smaller simply because yours was bigger. This behaviour creates an invisible competition over suffering even if you don't mean it.
Why the hurry?
Let's prefer not to interrupt anybody when they speak about their life problems even if we have bigger ones similar to that situation .we can wait till they finish and if it is significant to mention then we can add our story at the end without underestimating their experiences.
We often fail to recognise the weight people silently carry within them.
Sometimes, simply lending an ear can do what no prescription can.One meaningful conversation with our parents, siblings, partner, colleagues, seniors, friends, or even a stranger can calm a restless nervous system in ways we rarely acknowledge.
Life is certainly short.But what is the purpose of rushing through it if we never truly feel it?
We are all in a hurry to reach the finish line, forgetting that living was always meant to happen along the way.
Why do people ask, "Can you quickly tell me in short what happened?" or "Is there any short lecture available on YouTube for this content?" How can something be told or taught in gist if it actually contains too much . But nobody has time for anything that is lengthy and deep . And in trying to consume everything quickly, we are slowly becoming shallow, constantly anxious to know what comes next instead of fully experiencing what is here.
Do you realise how much a person wants to say but doesn't? Not because they don't trust us, but because the time and space we offer are often too small for them to pour their heart into. This is the reason why so many people feel chronically lonely.The more time and space we give someone, the better listeners we become . When you listen carefully,slowly your mind & heart starts analysing the situation and that eventually will make you more empathetic,kind and compassionate.
I love taking pauses while talking, whether in person or over a phone call. Those little pauses allow me to absorb the other person's emotions and they also encourage people to express themselves and tell me what exactly they are going through.
Human beings exist in countless layers. To discover them, we must be fully present.Someone telling you that they are excited for their new beginning in career in one breath is insanely excited and someone telling the same sentence with a deep exhale and a pause can mean that they are scared as well and tired of what they went through in the entire journey to achieve it .
Someone telling you about an event may go further to add how badly they regret hurting their parents last Tuesday when you genuinely listen.
I love it when someone asks me, "How is life?" and actually waits for the complete answer without looking at their phone or mentally checking out before I finish even the shortest sentence.
I love listening when people describe the architectural beauty of a city they recently visited, the fascinating history narrated by local guides that enriched their knowledge, the delicious food they ate after descending from the mountains with mouths watering as they recall every bite, or how they bargained for a chikankari kurta and finally found the exact colour they had been searching for.
I listen as though I am living those moments with them.
How cute and charming one looks while presenting their excitement and happiness .It is so mesmerizing to see how beautifully little things affect humans, just like to a child in kindergarten.
It is not always about us where we can add beautiful tags to the pages of our lives ,sometimes it is about experiencing someone else's life so deeply through conversation that their memories quietly become a part of ours too.
I still remember a conversation from nine years ago. A friend told me about her uncle battling a deadly disease and eventually recovering. I still remember the exact number of therapy sessions he underwent because I was emotionally engrossed throughout that conversation.
We often see people hear someone sharing their pain only to respond with ,"You can't even imagine what I've been through."
First of all , congratulations to them for winning the award of suffering the most. But someone else's pain does not become smaller simply because yours was bigger. This behaviour creates an invisible competition over suffering even if you don't mean it.
Why the hurry?
Let's prefer not to interrupt anybody when they speak about their life problems even if we have bigger ones similar to that situation .we can wait till they finish and if it is significant to mention then we can add our story at the end without underestimating their experiences.
We often fail to recognise the weight people silently carry within them.
Sometimes, simply lending an ear can do what no prescription can.One meaningful conversation with our parents, siblings, partner, colleagues, seniors, friends, or even a stranger can calm a restless nervous system in ways we rarely acknowledge.
Life is certainly short.But what is the purpose of rushing through it if we never truly feel it?
We are all in a hurry to reach the finish line, forgetting that living was always meant to happen along the way.
If you make someone feel understood, heard and emotionally validated, then you are being a human in the best way possible.
Perhaps that is both the least and the most every soul truly needs.
So let's slow down.
Listen.
Talk.
Feel.
Speak.
Express.
The world can wait a few more minutes.
